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Miracle Is Sunk

A Priest has died after trying to demonstrate how Jesus walked on water.

Evangelist preacher Franck Kabele, 35, told his congregation he could repeat the biblical miracle.

But he drowned after walking out to sea from a beach in the capital Libreville in Gabon, west Africa.

One eyewitness said: "He told churchgoers he'd had a revelation that if he had enough faith, he could walk on water like Jesus.

"He took his congregation to the beach saying he would walk across the Komo estuary, which takes 20 minutes by boat.

"He walked into the water, which soon passed over his head and he never came back."

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15 Comments

Current View: 15 / Show all Comments

Dj Spoonfed : LVL 25: VP 3.4: said:

Dj Spoonfed

15 votes NegativePositive

1165 days 23 hours ago...

Awesome!

kidnapjane : LVL 8: VP 1.7: said:

kidnapjane

17 votes NegativePositive

1165 days 23 hours ago...

Fucking fanatics.

MixxieTheDude : LVL 32: VP 4.1: said:

MixxieTheDude

9 votes NegativePositive

1165 days 22 hours ago...

I'm not sure if it's the same but with a twist of misunderstading - but recently a French-priest of African-decend did the same... He took a few supporters, a photographer and a boat onto a lake, stepped out of the boat and drowned. Love to see the photo's...

They all seem to be of African-decend maybe it's cause they're such fanatics in their Christianity... or a lack of water does strange things to you when you do have a lot of water around you all of a sudden...

ShadowofGod : LVL 25: VP 3.4: said:

ShadowofGod

35 votes NegativePositive

1165 days 22 hours ago...

Christians have it hard. Can't do anything fun without being sent to 'hell' when they die.

Much rather be a pastafarian. All we have to do is dress as pirates once in a while to reduce global warming, worship the Flying Spaghetti Monster, bless his noodly apendage, and strictly follow The Eight "I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts"(or not, whatever), which are:

1. I'd Really Rather You Didn't Act Like a Sanctimonious Holier-Than-Thou Ass When Describing My Noodly Goodness. If Some People Don't Believe In Me, That's Okay. Really, I'm Not That Vain. Besides, This Isn't About Them So Don't Change The Subject.
2. I'd Really Rather You Didn't Use My Existence As A Means To Oppress, Subjugate, Punish, Eviscerate, And/Or, You Know, Be Mean To Others. I Don't Require Sacrifices, And Purity Is For Drinking Water, Not People.
3. I'd Really Rather You Didn't Judge People For The Way They Look, Or How They Dress, Or The Way They Talk, Or, Well, Just Play Nice, Okay? Oh, And Get This In Your Thick Heads: Woman = Person. Man = Person. Samey - Samey. One Is Not Better Than The Other, Unless We're Talking About Fashion And I'm Sorry, But I Gave That To Women And Some Guys Who Know The Difference Between Teal and Fuchsia.
4. I'd Really Rather You Didn't Indulge In Conduct That Offends Yourself, Or Your Willing, Consenting Partner Of Legal Age AND Mental Maturity. As For Anyone Who Might Object, I Think The Expression Is Go Fuck Yourself, Unless They Find That Offensive In Which Case They Can Turn Off the TV For Once And Go For A Walk For A Change.
5. I'd Really Rather You Didn't Challenge The Bigoted, Misogynist, Hateful Ideas Of Others On An Empty Stomach. Eat, Then Go After The Bastard.
6. I'd Really Rather You Didn't Build Multimillion-Dollar Churches/Temples/Mosques/Shrines To My Noodly Goodness When The Money Could Be Better Spent (Take Your Pick):
1. Ending Poverty
2. Curing Diseases
3. Living In Peace, Loving With Passion, And Lowering The Cost Of Cable
I Might be a Complex-Carbohydrate Omniscient Being, But I Enjoy The Simple Things In Life. I Ought To Know. I AM the Creator.
7. I'd Really Rather You Didn't Go Around Telling People I Talk To You. You're Not That Interesting. Get Over Yourself. And I Told You To Love Your Fellow Man, Can't You Take A Hint?
8. I'd Really Rather You Didn't Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do Unto You If You Are Into, Um, Stuff That Uses A Lot of Leather/Lubricant/Las Vegas. If the Other Person Is Into It, However (Pursuant To #4), Then Have At It, Take Pictures, And For The Love Of Mike, Wear a CONDOM! Honestly, It's A Piece of Rubber. If I Didn't Want It To Feel Good When You Did It I Would Have Added Spikes, Or Something.

In return, we go to Pastafarian heaven, with beer volcanoes as far as the eye can see and a stripper factory at every intersection.

ARRRRGH MATEY!!!

darthmaximillian : LVL 33: VP 4.2: said:

darthmaximillian

34 votes NegativePositive

1165 days 21 hours ago...

His faith in his "God" convinced him that he could walk on water.

My "faith" in science convinced me he was a dumbass who would end up drowning.

I guess Darwin wins again. Speaking of Darwin, that moron deserves a Darwin award for lending natural selection a helping hand!!

laribo : LVL 34: VP 4.2: said:

laribo

12 votes NegativePositive

1165 days 21 hours ago...

That's some extreme stubborness right there.

"Hmm, this ain't working, I'm starting to drown, but I can't go up and admit defeat. oh no"

Groucho AKA DTK : LVL 2: VP 1.1: said:

Groucho AKA DTK

1 votes NegativePositive

1165 days 20 hours ago...

Any fool knows that you can walk over a swimming pool full of birds custard mix,but water?What a crazy fucker,what was he thinking?perhaps if he poured truckloads of Polycell wallpaper paste in and stired it for days and then tried then he may have had a chance.what a poor deluded guy.

Lunite129 : LVL 36: VP 4.4: said:

Lunite129

0 votes NegativePositive

1165 days 19 hours ago...

BAHAHAHAHA

Venomousvole : LVL 30: VP 3.9: said:

Venomousvole

7 votes NegativePositive

1165 days 19 hours ago...

In his own mind, moments before his thrashing desperate end. I bet he did walk on water. "I DID IT JESUS! I REALLY Ggluglglgil....."

jamiem89 : LVL 34: VP 4.2: said:

jamiem89

11 votes NegativePositive

1165 days 19 hours ago...

"He walked into the water, which soon passed over his head and he never came back."

5/5 just for that line.

Miss Team Amerika : LVL 2: VP 1.1: said:

Miss Team Amerika

8 votes NegativePositive

1165 days 18 hours ago...

Nobody tried to save him. They are all going to hell.

Godsim : LVL 41: VP 4.9: said:

Godsim

1 votes NegativePositive

1165 days 17 hours ago...

HAHAHAHA!!! I pity the fool!!! Sad, but some people insist in learning some things the hard way.

--> God isn't a guy watching us, saying: "oh what a good strong believing person! I'll better make him walk on water or he'll be mad with me."

lowsol : LVL 33: VP 4.2: said:

lowsol

9 votes NegativePositive

1165 days 16 hours ago...

How did he live to be 35????

Groucho AKA DTK : LVL 2: VP 1.1: said:

Groucho AKA DTK

12 votes NegativePositive

1165 days 16 hours ago...

Lowsol,He lived until 35 because he walked on the land.

Laribo,well done,very Mitch Hedberg.

LithuanianLabourer : LVL 21: VP 3: said:

LithuanianLabourer

0 votes NegativePositive

1165 days 15 hours ago...

Priceless !
Be born , die , go and see Jesus !

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Entry Dates: 9/8/2007-9/14/2009