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Dumb Instructions

Warning: May contain nuts." -- On a package of peanuts. "Do not eat." -- On a slip of paper in a stereo box, referring to the styrofoam packing. "Access hole only -- not intended for use in lifting box." -- On the sides of a shipping carton, just above cut-out openings which one would assume were handholds. "Warning: May cause drowsiness." -- On a bottle of Nytol, a brand of sleeping pills. "Warning: Misuse may cause injury or death." -- Stamped on the metal barrel of a .22 calibre rifle. "Do not use orally after using rectally." -- In the instructions for an electric thermometer. "Turn off motor before using this product." -- On the packaging for a chain saw file, used to sharpen the cutting teeth on the chain. "Not to be used as a personal flotation device." -- On a 6x10 inch inflatable picture frame. "Do not put in mouth." -- On a box of bottle rockets. "Please remove before driving." -- On the back of a cardboard windshield (for keeping the car from getting too hot when parked). "Remove plastic before eating." -- On the wrapper of a Fruit Roll-Up snack. "Not dishwasher safe." -- On a remote control for a TV. "For lifting purposes only." -- On the box for a car jack. "Do not put lit candles on phone." -- On the instructions for a cordless phone. "Warning! This is not underwear! Do not attempt to put in pants." -- On the packaging for a wristwatch. "Do not recharge, put in backwards, or use." -- On a battery.

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Entry Dates: 9/8/2007-9/14/2009