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No BarbedWire...Might Hurt Thieves

A gardener who put up barbed wire to protect his allotment from thieves has been ordered to take it down in case intruders hurt themselves.

Bill Malcolm, 61, was told to "remove it on health and safety grounds" by the local council which owns the allotments in Marlbrook, Worcestershire.

He erected the deterrent after thieves struck three times in four months, stealing more than £300 worth of spades, forks, hoes and wrecking his potato patch in the process.

Mr Malcolm said: "It's an absolutely ridiculous situation, all I wanted was to protect my property but the wire had to go in case a thief scratched himself.

"I told them to let the thief sue me so at least that way I would know who was breaking into my allotment but everything I said fell on deaf ears.

"The barbed wire was a single strand and ringing my property only. It was just three foot high and wasn't as though I'd dug a moat filled with piranha and erected six foot iron railings."

A spokesman for Bromsgrove District Council said: "With regard to the barbed wire, we are obliged to request its removal or remove it on health and safety grounds to the general public, as this is a liability issue."

She advised allotment tenants with security concerns to contact the local police.

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15 Comments

Current View: 15 / Show all Comments

RedNog : LVL 27: VP 3.6: said:

RedNog

58 votes NegativePositive

407 days 17 hours ago...

He should have dug a moat filled with piranha and erected six foot iron railings, they probably would have let that slide.

Violetninja420 : LVL 38: VP 4.6: said:

Violetninja420

35 votes NegativePositive

407 days 16 hours ago...

Guess landmines will have to suffice then...

blizzloader : LVL 45: VP 5: said:

blizzloader

33 votes NegativePositive

407 days 16 hours ago...

Same thing happend to a pub i used to work at. We put razor wire around the walls and the owner was orderd to removed it after someone got hurt breaking into the joint..

This is in Australia too :(

oddjob458 : LVL 41: VP 4.9: said:

oddjob458

30 votes NegativePositive

407 days 16 hours ago...

^^ or sharks with laser beams attached to their head.

puffmax : LVL 39: VP 4.7: said:

puffmax

37 votes NegativePositive

407 days 16 hours ago...

Jeez what a retarded council of people...than it turns out it was the council who was stealing shit since they had a problem with his hoes.

Fatelessdestiny : LVL 33: VP 4.2: said:

Fatelessdestiny

31 votes NegativePositive

407 days 16 hours ago...

why not just put the barbed wire fence within his property, and have another fence that goes around the perimeter of the property? that way, it`s not a danger to the public, since the regular fence wouldn`t be sharp, and then, if the people hopped the regular fence to the property, the barbed wire fence would get in the way.

there are always legal loop holes :)

Shifty : LVL 38: VP 4.6: said:

Shifty

9 votes NegativePositive

407 days 16 hours ago...

ok fine no barb wire ill just get my self a shotgun kill the fuckers and they cant even sue me ha!

pyranos : LVL 39: VP 4.7: said:

pyranos

17 votes NegativePositive

407 days 15 hours ago...

Leave it to the aussies to protect criminals...

rhuitron : LVL 36: VP 4.4: said:

rhuitron

2 votes NegativePositive

407 days 14 hours ago...

Fuck them!

If the things are that much worth to be stealing, let them work for it!

Gives me more of a chance to get meh 12 gauge shoty for his/her body!

Locos Mocos : LVL 1: VP 1: said:

Locos Mocos

3 votes NegativePositive

407 days 14 hours ago...

set up an obstacle course and sit back about 100 yards with a .270 and try and hit the moving targets!

disco dirk : LVL 13: VP 2.2: said:

disco dirk

6 votes NegativePositive

407 days 13 hours ago...

Have a bunch of rakes lying around the floor, one of them is bound to smack a thief in the face if he steps on it

Flynn_2006 : LVL 44: VP 5: said:

Flynn_2006

3 votes NegativePositive

407 days 13 hours ago...

Guard dog, security camera and shotgun.

Vicsand : LVL 40: VP 4.8: said:

Vicsand

11 votes NegativePositive

407 days 13 hours ago...

Actually here in america if there`s any type of bobby traps left for the thief to get hurt on he can sue your ass and get away scott free for robbing your house. These was a case were a woman put up a bunch of trip lines on her roof, some dude got on the roof, slipped, fell through the sky window and then when the cops came he told them about the trip line and the lady was sent to jail while the dude was sent to a hospital it`s all right in the law books.

Lunearetic : LVL 35: VP 4.3: said:

Lunearetic

10 votes NegativePositive

407 days 13 hours ago...

^ That is some fucked up shit right there. I never understood how that worked. They aren`t even supposed to be on your property in the first place!

br[OWN]ie : LVL 34: VP 4.2: said:

br[OWN]ie

2 votes NegativePositive

407 days 11 hours ago...

"£300 worth of spades, forks, hoes"<-- hoe (plural hoes)
An agricultural tool consisting of a long handle with a flat blade fixed perpendicular to it at the end, used for digging rows.

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Entry Dates: 9/8/2007-9/14/2009