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Marijuana Vending Machine - Los Angeles


Article Submitted by geoblaze.

Most of your essentials are already distributed by vending machines: condoms, electronics, luscious 1-calorie Tab... But now, you can finally get what you really need: medical marijuana, from Anytime Vending Machines.

AVMs are 24/7 machines housed in standalone rooms, abutting two dispensaries and protected by round-the-clock security guards -- like ATMs for people combating psychological withdrawal with a physical one. After cinching up your doctor's consultation, hit an AVM location to get your prescription approved, fingerprint taken, and a prepaid credit card loaded with your profile: dosage (3.5 or 7 grams, up to 1oz a week) and strain preference (choice of five, including OG Cush and Granddaddy Purple, the mildly hallucinogenic forebear to Prince). Then day or night, all you do is hit a machine and walk away with enough vacuum-sealed, plastic-encapsulated cheeba to adequately treat your illness.

The AVMs are already in place at their respective dispensaries and will be fully-operational by Monday, though their vestibules are still under construction; future plans include machine-vended pharmaceuticals like Vicodin, Viagra, and Propecia -- for when the excessive chemicals in Tab have wracked you with pain, limpness, and baldness.

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15 Comments

Current View: 15 / Show all Comments

blizzloader : LVL 42: VP 5: said:

blizzloader

7 votes NegativePositive

259 days 12 hours ago...

dam i want some of that right now

alifeva1 : LVL 9: VP 1.8: said:

alifeva1

48 votes NegativePositive

259 days 12 hours ago...

Fuck. Starting to put us dealers out of business already. Knew this day was coming... :-/ I gotta go find a job.

Unmannedperson : LVL 38: VP 4.6: said:

Unmannedperson

27 votes NegativePositive

259 days 12 hours ago...

I`ll start the bet.

2 minutes until the first robbery of one of these things!

miksah2001 : LVL 33: VP 4.2: said:

miksah2001

31 votes NegativePositive

259 days 12 hours ago...

damn, we californians rock.

medical marijuana is much more affordable and effective than the crap pharmaceutical companies sell

rhuitron : LVL 29: VP 3.8: said:

rhuitron

19 votes NegativePositive

259 days 12 hours ago...

I cant wait until someone hacks this thing.

LOL!

PizzaBoi : LVL 24: VP 3.3: said:

PizzaBoi

4 votes NegativePositive

259 days 11 hours ago...

OG Cush?! WTF GET YOUR WEED TERMINOLOGY RIGHT!

hellrazor : LVL 34: VP 4.2: said:

hellrazor

1 votes NegativePositive

259 days 11 hours ago...

Sign me up.

stndspec : LVL 33: VP 4.2: said:

stndspec

17 votes NegativePositive

259 days 6 hours ago...

that machine is staring at me.. it is cooler than other machines, and it fucking knows it. just like hal from 2001 knew he was a badarse, this smug-looking contraption here is flanked by it`s own armed henchmen, and is carrying enough green to smoke out me and everyone i know for a year probably.. yes this machine is better than other machines, and many people, and it knows it.

Ray Kurzweil says we`re gonna see AI capable of simulating human thought in something like 15 or 20 years.. these sorts of machines will rule the human world for their overlord masters when that day comes, because we will have already got 15 years of practice being their bitchez man..! <back to my bowl, already in progress.. sadly my smoke is nowhere nearly as good as what`s in that black box there..>

baklavafiend : LVL 40: VP 4.8: said:

baklavafiend

28 votes NegativePositive

259 days 4 hours ago...

awesome. it needs a vending machine for the munchies next to it.

Cpt. Amadeus : LVL 35: VP 4.3: said:

Cpt. Amadeus

4 votes NegativePositive

259 days 3 hours ago...

"hit an AVM location to get your prescription approved, fingerprint taken, and a prepaid credit card loaded with your profile"

yeah it`s only a matter of time until someone finds a way around the system

or someone tries to steal the entire machine.

gods965 : LVL 35: VP 4.3: said:

gods965

6 votes NegativePositive

259 days 1 hour ago...

there is a god

draser : LVL 34: VP 4.2: said:

draser

18 votes NegativePositive

259 days ago...

Can they make one for hookers?

PizzaBoi : LVL 24: VP 3.3: said:

PizzaBoi

6 votes NegativePositive

258 days 21 hours ago...

^ there`s prolly one in thailand somewhere.

i wouldn`t bank on the quality, though.

EntropY* : LVL 33: VP 4.2: said:

EntropY*

-2 votes NegativePositive

258 days 20 hours ago...

And people get excited about it...

just another sign. Who`s up for nominating Hilary as the next Caligula?

Th3 4nSweR : LVL 36: VP 4.4: said:

Th3 4nSweR

1 votes NegativePositive

258 days 18 hours ago...

its spelt kush u amatuer

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