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Zero's Weekly Advice Column, June 06, 20...

If you have a question and need a fresh perspective, email it to me. Xxoozero@yahoo.com. I promise to lead you in some sort of direction. Maybe not the best direction, but a direction none the less.

Dear Zero,
I'm in the military, and I've recently slept with one of my coworkers. She's around the same rank, so there's not a law against it. I've talked to others and get the "Don't shit where you eat/eat where you shit" line. After she left that night, I found out the condom had a tear. It hasn't been long enough for her to know if she's pregnant. I pretty much like this girl and could see a relationship happen, but not a marriage. I haven't been back to work and seen her since that night. I could use some help, I'm just not sure where to go from here.


Act like it never happened. The dudes who told you not to shit where you eat were right on. All you can hope for is that things don’t get weird between you. If you play it cool, this whole thing will blow over soon and you will know better in the future.

The bright side is… you got some pussy. For the rest, see #3.

Dear Zero...
I want to bang hot chicks, I mean seriously don’t we all, so I could use some of your wisdom on the best way to go about achieving the "no-strings attached hookup", anything you can advise would help?


Two words: dead hookers.


Dear Zero…
I was dating this girl for three and a half years. She is five years older than me, which put a big strain on the relationship from the start. Now that just started college, I feel the weight of our relationship lifted when she and I decided to break up. The issue is that she is a closet freak about sex. Since I was her only sexual encounter, she wants to fuck me constantly.

Am I wrong for continually having sex with her even though we are not together and open to new relationships?

What can I do to keep her feelings subdued? I would like to not be in a relationship with her.


The theme this week seems to be that nobody wants a relationship, but everybody wants sex. Fair enough, I feel the exact same way.

You’re not wrong and there is absolutely nothing you can do to keep her feelings subdued. You bought the ticket, take the ride. Accept the fact that is probably going to end badly and get all the sex you can before that happens.


Dear Zero...
I had a question for you, and require advice in one of your "areas of expertise": I was thinking about buying around $200-$300 worth of purple, and wondering how much I could probably get for that amount without getting ripped off. I'm living in (censored), and some of the best quality shit is grown here. And apparently the kinds I’m getting are Imperial Purple and the Purple Widow, wondering if this is different from the famed "Purple Haze”?


I have heard from certain pot aficionados that the famed “Purple Haze” is a myth. These guys don’t know shite. I knew a girl once when I ran the old pot site who was an excellent grower and sent me stuff regularly. Of all the potheads I have ever met or smoked with, this woman knew more about weed than 90% of them. She once sent me a strain of Purple Haze. It was fucking bomb.

However, what you are getting is probably not a proper strain of Purple Haze. Most of the time, unless you get it straight from the grower, it is mislabeled. Anything with a purplish color these days is called Purple something-or-other.

A per how to get stuff without being ripped off, the best chance is to find someone you trust to help you obtain it. There is no magic top nine list yet written that explains how to get good weed at cheap prices. There will be in about a week though.

  • xxoozero
  • posted by xxoozero
  • Date 6/6/2007 3:20:54 PM
  • Views: 3190
  • Mature
  • Mature
  • Drug Content, Language

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4 Comments

Current View: 15 / Show all Comments

nova1999 : LVL 40: VP 4.8: said:

nova1999

17 votes NegativePositive

547 days 4 hours ago...

So by dead Hookers does that mean you should kill the hooker when your done or fuck a dead hooker?

jdan : LVL 49: VP 5: said:

jdan

-7 votes NegativePositive

547 days 3 hours ago...

whooo! zero!!!

nick20404 : LVL 42: VP 5: said:

nick20404

2 votes NegativePositive

546 days 19 hours ago...

dear zero stop.

DontStoned : LVL 31: VP 4: said:

DontStoned

-3 votes NegativePositive

545 days 1 hour ago...

Dead Nick20404 ^^
Stop Reading.
ITs good shit, but no one forces you to read it.

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