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cheech & chong try to get on welfare.
a guy walks into the local welfare office, marches straight up to the counter and says, "hi. you know, i just hate drawing welfare. i'd really rather have a job." the social worker behind the counter says, "your timing is excellent. we just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter. you'll have to drive around in his mercedes, and he'll supply all of your clothes. because of the long hours, meals will be provided. you'll be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips and you will have to satisfy her sexual urges. you'll be provided a two-bedroom apartment above the garage. the salary is $200,000 a year." the guy, wide-eyed, says, "you're bullshittin' me!" the social worker says, "yeah, well... you started it."
a guy walks into the local welfare office, marches straight up to the counter and says, "hi, you know, i just hate drawing welfare. i'd really rather have a job."
the social worker behind the counter says, your timing is excellent. we just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and bodyguard for his nymphomaniac daughter. you'll have to drive around in his mercedes, but he'll supply all of your uniforms and clothes.
because of the long hours, meals will be provided. you'll be expected to escort her on her overseas holiday trips. you will have to satisfy her sexual urges. you'll have a two-bedroom apartment above the garage. the starting salary is $200,000 a year.
the guy says, "you're bullshittin' me!"
the social worker says, "yeah, well... you started it."
meat well tenderised.
funny clip from cheech and chong: next movie.
article submitted by rhuitron. out of work? need government help? you’re going to have to consider rehab first in some states, if new proposed legislation is passed. at least eight states have lawmakers who are in favor of random drug testing for people who receive food states, unemployment, or other forms of welfare. critics are worried that such policies would discourage people from seeking help, but those n favor say that welfare recipients should be working towards a future without government aid, which is difficult to do if money is going towards drugs. west virginia lawmaker craig blair, who started the website notwithmytaxdollars.com says that many jobs require drug testing, so it isn’t a huge leap to require it for welfare recipients as well. west virginia isn’t the only state that is actively considering welfare drug testing laws. other legislation has been introduced to limit who gets government help: * yesterday, the kansas house of representations approved a welfare drug testing mandate. it now goes before the state senate. * oklahoma passed a measure last month that requires drug testing for those receiving tanf benefits. missouri and hawaii are also both considering the same regulations. * in florida, government officials are considering a bill that would institute random unemployment drug testing. * minnesota may soon have new laws requiring drug testing for all who get public assistance from the state. early this year, drug testing laws failed in arizona, but that may not be the end of such proposals. in the past 20 years, such laws have also failed in other states, including in michigan, where critics said it violated the 4th amendment’s protection against unreasonable search and seizure. states must also consider the cost of such programs, since drug testing is fairly expensive on a mass level. in december, over 31.7 million people received food stamps and unemployment rates were higher than they have been since the 1960s. already, drug testing is required in six states for public assistance if you are a convicted felon or parolee. source, source
