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two boys are playing hockey on the pond on boston common, when one is attacked by a vicious rottweiler. thinking quickly, the other boy took his hockey stick and managed to wedge it down the dog's collar and twist, luckily breaking the dog's neck and stopping its attack. a reporter who was strolling by sees the incident, and rushes over to interview the boy. "young bruins fan saves friend from vicious animal..." he starts writing in his notebook. "but, i'm not a bruins fan," the little hero replied. "sorry, since we're in boston, i just assumed you were," said the reporter and starts again. "red sox fan rescues friend from horrific attack..." he continued writing in his notebook. "i'm not a red sox fan either!" the boy said. "i assumed everyone in boston was either for the bruins or the red sox. so, what team do you root for?" the reporter asked. "i'm a yankees fan!" the child beamed. the reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes: "little bastard from new york kills beloved family pet."
3 lb pomeranian humps a 130 lb rottweiller's face
question: what is the difference between an overzealous irs agent and a rottweiler? answer: the rottweiler will let go, eventually.
a man takes his rottweiler to the vet. "my dog's cross-eyed. is there anything you can do for him?" "well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him" so he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. finally, he says "i'm going to have to put him down." "what? because he's cross-eyed?" "no, because he's really heavy"
