Spiked Humor Crave Online

Video:

priest loves children

this priest really loves his children.

• 3.304/5
• 7567
• 17
• 6/21/2005
• by Link459

Video:

the new priest

the new priest is nervous about hearing confessions, so he asks the older priest to sit in on his sessions. the new priest hears a couple of confessions, then the old priest asks him to step out of the confessional for a few suggestions.

the old priest suggests, "cross your arms over your chest, and rub your chin with one hand and try saying things like 'yes, i see,' and 'yes, go on,' and 'i understand.'"

the new priest crosses his arms, rubs his chin with one hand and repeats all the suggested remarks to the old priest.

the old priest says, "now, don't you think that's a little better than slapping your knee and saying, "no shit...what happened next?

• 3.6979/5
• 2882
• 5
• 2/10/2006
• by sn1per_uk

Video:

an irish priest

an irish priest is driving down to new york and gets stopped for speeding in connecticut.

the state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car.

he says, "sir, have you been drinking?"

"just water," says the priest.

the trooper says, "then why do i smell wine?"

the priest looks at the bottle and says, "good lord! he's done it again!"

• 3.368/5
• 469
• 3
• 3/15/2006
• by sn1per_uk

Video:

new priest

there was an old priest who got sick of all the people in his parish confessing to adultery.

one sunday, in the pulpit, he said, "if i hear one more person confess to adultery, i'll quit!"

well, everyone liked him, so they came up with a code word. someone who had committed adultery would say instead that they had 'fallen.'

this seemed to satisfy the old priest and things went well until the priest passed away at a ripe old age.

a few days after the new priest arrived, he visited the mayor of the town and seemed very concerned.

"mayor, you have to do something about the sidewalks in town. when people come into the confessional, they keep telling me they've fallen."

the mayor started to laugh, realizing that no one had told the new priest about the code word. but, before he could explain, the priest shook an accusing finger at him and shouted, "i don't know what you're laughing about, because your wife has fallen three times this week!"

• 4.2105/5
• 3237
• 11
• 8/13/2006
• by KoKanE

Video:

nude priest prank

two priests get unsuspecting passers by to take a photo of them, and the photo turns out to be rather naughty.

• 3.5088/5
• 12043
• 21
• 5/14/2006
• by Beeziie

Video:

pissed off priest

imagine how bad you would have to piss off a priest before he hits you.

• 3.25/5
• 7218
• 45
• 6/15/2006
• by The Gatekeeper

Video:

the priest and his cock

a priest was in his room and realised that his rooster was missing. he decided to bring it up in sunday mass.

right before the seremony the priest asked, "who has a cock?" all the men in the room stood up.

the priest said "no, no, no. who has seen a cock?" all the woman in the room stood up.

the priest said "no, no, no. who has seen my cock?". all of the nuns stood up.

• 3.6723/5
• 3890
• 9
• 7/15/2006
• by John_T1

Video:

john safran vs god episode 5-1 masturbating in a priests bed

john travels to sicily to confess to a priest that he stole some batteries and masturbated in a bed owned by the priest during race around the world.

• 3.8333/5
• 862
• 0
• 3/15/2007
• by JiminJapan

Video:

a priest and a rabbi leave a bar,

a priest and a rabbi leave a bar, and see a ten year old boy. the priest says "let's screw him!" and the rabbi says "out of what?"

• 4.2476/5
• 146
• 1
• 8/3/2009
• by sc1zzen

Video:

a nun and a priest

a nun and a priest were traveling across the desert and realized halfway across that the camel they were using for transportation was about to die. they set up a make-shift camp, hoping someone would come to their rescue, but to no avail. soon the camel died. after several days of not being rescued, they agreed that they were not going to be rescued. they prayed a lot (of course), and they discussed their predicament in great depth.

finally the priest said to the nun, "you know, sister, i am about to die, and there's always been one thing i've wanted here on earth to see a woman naked. would you mind taking off your clothes so i can look at you?"

the nun thought about his request for several seconds and then agreed to take off her clothes. as she was doing so, she remarked, "well, father, now that i think about it, i've never seen a man naked, either. would you mind taking off your clothes, too?" with little hesitation, the priest also stripped.

suddenly the nun exclaimed, "father! what is that little thing hanging between your legs?"

the priest patiently answered, "that, my child, is a gift from god. if i put it in you, it creates a new life."

"well," responded the nun, "forget about me. stick it in the camel and lets get the hell out of here!"

• 3.2699/5
• 3429
• 4
• 1/14/2006
• by sn1per_uk

Video:

anxious, possibly perverted, priest

i suppose this priest wouldn't get much action in his line of work, so he decides to assist a woman at her communion and wedding with a piece of bread he 'accidentally' dropped down the breast of her dress.

• 3.679/5
• 20691
• 16
• 7/11/2005
• by Scienott

Video:

priest's foul mouthed rant

australian catholic priest monsignor geoff baron has been suspended after this footage of him, heaping obscene insults upon a group of skateboarders, surfaced on youtube.

• 3.3/5
• 3090
• 35
• 8/7/2007
• by MindHunt

Video:

child molesting priest leads to 'shattered' faith

former l.a. times journalist william lobdell recalls reporting on members of a catholic church who rallied to support a child molesting priest. the incident "shattered" lobdell's faith, causing him to reconsider his conversion to catholicism.

• 4.6458/5
• 4988
• 67
• 6/10/2009
• by psychologyprofessor

Video:

'priest' with 7.7 lbs of coke arrested

amsterdam, netherlands — a man claiming to be a catholic priest was arrested friday at amsterdam's schiphol airport after he was caught carrying 7.7 pounds of cocaine under his robes, a spokesman for dutch border police said.

the suspect, whose identity was being traced, initially refused to undergo a routine body check "for religious reasons," spokesman robert van kapel said.

he said the man was then spotted lining up at a different entrance gate. he was searched and the drugs were found in packages taped to his body.

"we've seen a lot of things, baseballs filled with cocaine, wine bottles, plaster casts, but this is a first," van kapel said.

he said the man, who was traveling from bolivia, continued to insist he is a priest and did not confess any wrongdoing, arguing his rights had been violated by the search.

van kapel said that was bunk.

"if you want to enter (europe) you have to pass a security check, you have to cooperate and you can't refuse a body search," he said. "he'll be brought before a judge today."

source

have any interesting articles you'd like to share?
article request thread.

• 4.6426/5
• 2250
• 11
• 1/11/2008
• by InsayneJayne

Video:

priest

>>the priest in a small irish village loved his chickens that he kept >>in the >>coop behind the church. >>one sunday morning before mass, he went to feed the birds and >>discovered >>that the cock was missing. >>he knew about the cock fights in the village, so he decided to >>question his >>parishioners in church. >>during mass, he asked his congregation, "has anybody got a >>cock?".......................

>> >>all the men stood up. >>"no, no, that wasn't what i meant. has any body seen a >>cock?".........................

>> >>all the women stood up. >>"no, no, that wasn't what i meant either. has anybody seen a cock >>that >>doesn't belong to them?"..............

>> >>half the women stood up. >> >> >>"no, no, no, that wasn't what i meant. what i really mean is, has >>anybody >>seen my cock?"

>> >> >> >>sixteen altar boys, two priests and a goat stood up. >>

• 3.7199/5
• 285
• 0
• 3/30/2007
• by mrwhiteba

Video:

priest organizes beauty contest for nuns

rome - an italian priest and theologian said sunday he is organizing an online beauty pageant for nuns to give them more visibility within the catholic church and to fight the stereotype that they are all old and dour.

the "miss sister 2008" contest will start in september on a blog run by the rev. antonio rungi and will give nuns from around the world a chance to showcase their work and their image.

"nuns are a bit excluded, they are a bit marginalized in ecclesiastical life," rungi told the associated press after italian media carried reports of the idea. "this will be an occasion to make their contribution more visible."

rungi, a theologian and schoolteacher from the naples area, said that visitors to his site will have a month to "vote for the nun they consider a model."

nuns will fill out a profile including information about their life and vocation as well as a photograph. it will be up to them to choose whether to pose with the traditional veil or with their heads uncovered.

"we are not going to parade nuns in bathing suits," rungi said by telephone from his town of mondragone. "but being ugly is not a requirement for becoming a nun. external beauty is gift from god, and we mustn't hide it."

rungi said the idea was first suggested to him by nuns with whom he regularly prays and works. he hopes there will be dozens of submissions once the web site is started.

the contest drew criticism from the association of catholic teachers.

"it's an initiative that belittles the role of nuns who have dedicated themselves to god," the group's president, alberto giannino, told italy's ansa news agency on sunday.

source

• 4.7229/5
• 1969
• 21
• 8/24/2008
• by InsayneJayne

Video:

national banana: priest off

national banana brings you a new repellent product. thanks johnhotnix

• 3.99/5
• 1097
• 2
• 7/4/2008
• by Glitchen

Video:

how priests in south america perform christenings

i guess he really wanted to save her soul

• 4.3197/5
• 1511
• 6
• 10/25/2009
• by ibji

Video:

zombie-killing priest from "gone bad"

this is the first short form gone bad. i really wish they would have turned this into a feature length cartoon.

• 4.6161/5
• 2179
• 9
• 12/5/2008
• by evilxi

Video:

judas priest - rocka rolla

this clip is taken from the old grey whistle test.

• 3.5333/5
• 945
• 3
• 7/8/2007
• by rhino69

Video:

dumb priest, holy water

this cardinal uses his microphone for spreading holy water.

• 3.2/5
• 3548
• 15
• 7/17/2007
• by rhino69

Video:

priest

i'm sure i'll goto hell for this.

• 3.402/5
• 2878
• 8
• 3/12/2006
• by tl12000

Video:

priest reads text message while preaching

greek priests are obviously with the times.

• 3.3571/5
• 3660
• 31
• 9/16/2006
• by Etruria

Video:

judas priest

paint it black--rolling stones--judas priest cover

• 3.1667/5
• 152
• 3
• 10/15/2006
• by Viktorjanski