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weebl & bob - 68 - politics
ali g speaking about iraq/iran and flashy politics
tennis star and gay activist martina navratilova explains why the gay community is so engaged in politics.
ali g starts making big changes in british politics and how the country works. respekt.
a bunch of broward county, fla. republicans convened at a local rifle range to talk politics and squeeze off a few rounds at bulls eyes. one of them was a poster of a scary dude in a traditional middle eastern headdress -- another was human likeness with the initials of local democratic rep. debbie wasserman schultz
lil' johnny goes to his dad and asks, "what is politics?" dad says, "well son, let me try to explain it this way. i'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me capitalism. mommy is the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the government. we're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you the people. the nanny, well, consider her the working class. your baby brother, we'll call him the future. now go think about this and see if it makes sense."
so the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad has said. later that night, he hears his baby brother crying and runs to his room only to find that his diapers are very soiled. so the little boy goes to his parents' room. mom is sound asleep.
not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. finding the door locked, he looks through the peephole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. he gives up and goes back to bed.
the next morning, the little boy says to his father, "dad, i think i understand what politics is now."
"good son, tell me in your own words then what politics are."
the little boy replies, "well, while capitalism is screwing the working class, the government is sound asleep, the people are being ignored and the future is in deep shit."
lil' johnny goes to his dad and asks, "what is politics?" dad says, "well son, let me try to explain it this way. i'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me capitalism. mommy is the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the government. we're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you the people. the nanny, well, consider her the working class. your baby brother, we'll call him the future. now go think about this and see if it makes sense." so the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad has said. later that night, he hears his baby brother crying and runs to his room only to find that his diapers are very soiled. so the little boy goes to his parents' room. mom is sound asleep. not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. finding the door locked, he looks through the peephole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. he gives up and goes back to bed. the next morning, the little boy says to his father, "dad, i think i understand what politics is now." "good son, tell me in your own words then what politics are." the little boy replies, "well, while capitalism is screwing the working class, the government is sound asleep, the people are being ignored and the future is in deep shit."
more from lewis blacks appearance on larry king live.
robert novak, frustrated by james carville's comments that he is trying to impress the right wing, utters profanity and storms off the cnn set.
didn't get this one at first.
90s stand up comedy performance by bill maher
i wish i can translate what they are saying so it would be more funny, but that's okay. that guy is a badass!
a good old-fashioned fight between two politicians
anyone who smokes chronic can relate to this scene, pretty funny.
a christian democrat: you have two cows. you keep one and give one to your neighbor. a socialist: you have two cows. the government takes one and gives it to your neighbor. an american republican: you have two cows. your neighbor has none. so what? an american democrat: you have two cows. your neighbor has none. you feel guilty for being successful. you vote people into office who tax your cows, forcing you to sell one to raise money to pay the tax. the people you voted for then take the tax money and buy a cow and give it to your neighbor. you feel righteous. a communist: you have two cows. the government seizes both and provides you with milk. a fascist: you have two cows. the government seizes both and sells you the milk. you join the underground and start a campaign of sabotage. democracy, american style: you have two cows. the government taxes you to the point you have to sell both to support a man in a foreign country who has only one cow, which was a gift from your government. capitalism, american style: you have two cows. you sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows. bureaucracy, american style: you have two cows. the government takes them both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, then pours the milk down the drain. an american corporation: you have two cows. you sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. you are surprised when the cow drops dead. a french corporation: you have two cows. you go on strike because you want three cows. a japanese corporation: you have two cows. you redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. you then create clever cow cartoon images called cowkimon and market them world-wide. a german corporation: you have two cows. you reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves. a british corporation: you have two cows. they are mad. they die. pass the shepherd`s pie, please. an italian corporation: you have two cows, but you don`t know where they are. you break for lunch. a russian corporation: you have two cows. you count them and learn you have five cows. you count them again and learn you have 42 cows. you count them again and learn you have 12 cows. you stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka. a swiss corporation: you have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. you charge others for storing them. a brazilian corporation: you have two cows. you enter into a partnership with an american corporation. soon you have 1000 cows and the american corporation declares bankruptcy. an indian corporation: you have two cows. you worship both of them. a chinese corporation: you have two cows. you have 300 people milking them. you claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported on them. an israeli corporation: there are these two jewish cows, right? they open a milk factory, an ice cream store, and then sell the movie rights. they send their calves to harvard to become doctors. so, who needs people? an arkansas corporation: you have two cows. that one on the left is kinda cute.
clip from the australian t.v. show newstopia, explaining the u.s. election process.
part 2. sorry for it being an embed.
and still be tax-exempt..
stanhope is the king!
here is the whole show for you people.
author fareed zakaria criticizes american political culture for ignoring global issues, and for focusing on short-term political benefits at the expense of long-term prosperity. the rise of other nations need not mean a decline of the u.s., says zakaria. he foresees a future where the u.s. no longer dominates the global economy, geopolitics and culture, and it needn't be seen as a negative development, he believes; our nation needs to learn to understand other nations and find a way to thrive in this rapidly shifting dynamic.
it's been done before expect the doctors threats, propaganda, and nonsense politics.
"a good politician is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar." h. l. mencken "run for office? no. i've slept with too many women, i've done too many drugs, and i've been to too many parties." george clooney "today, the l.a. times accused arnold schwarzenegger of groping six women. i'm telling you, this guy is presidential material." dave letterman "politicians are wonderful people as long as they stay away from things they don't understand, such as working for a living." p. j. orourke "politics is perhaps the only profession for which no preparation is thought necessary." robert louis stevenson "politics is not a bad profession. if you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book." ronald reagan
interesting documentary on the rise of covert politics in america and the middle east - and how the two connected to make the events we know today. part 2/part 3.
