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two doctors and an hmo manager die and line up together at the pearly gates. one doctor steps forward and tells st. peter, "as a pediatric surgeon, i saved hundreds of children." st. peter lets him enter. the next doctor says, "as a psychiatrist, i helped thousands of people live better lives." st. peter tells him to go ahead. the last man says, "i was an hmo manager. i got countless families cost-effective health care." st. peter replies, "you may enter. but," he adds, "you can only stay for three days. after that, you need to go to the other place."
three nurses went to heaven, and were awaiting their turn with st. peter to plead their case to enter the pearly gates. the first nurse said, "i worked in an emergency room. we tried our best to help patients, even though occasionally we did lose one. i think i deserve to go to heaven." st. peter looks at her file and admits her to heaven. the second nurse says, "i worked in an operating room. it`s a very high stress environment and we do our best. sometimes the patients are too sick and we lose them, but overall we try very hard." st. peter looks at her file and admits her to heaven. the third nurse says, "i was a case manager for an hmo." st. peter looks at her file. he pulls out a calculator and starts punching away at it furiously, constantly going back to the nurse`s file. after a few minutes st. peter looks up, smiles, and says, "congratulations! you`ve been admitted to heaven ... for five days!"
if this is your dr's office, its time to change your medical insurance.
