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Video:Little Johnny's Too Smart For First Grade

little johnny's too smart for first grade

a first grade teacher, mrs brooks was having trouble with one of her students.

the teacher asked, "johnny what is your problem?"

johnny answered, "i am too smart for the first grade. my sister is in the third grade and i am smarter than she is! i think i should be in third grade too."

mrs brooks had had enough. she took johnny to the principal's office.

while johnny waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. the principal told mrs brooks he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first grade and behave. she agreed. johnny was brought in and the conditions explained to him and he agreed to take the test.

principal: "what is 3 x 3?"

johnny: "9."

principal: "what is 6 x 6 ?"

johnny: "36."

and so it went with every question the principal thought a third grade should know. the principal looks at mrs brooks and tells her, "i think johnny can go to the third grade."

mrs brooks says to the principal, "let me ask him, some questions?" the principal and johnny both agree.

mrs brooks: "what does a cow have four of that i have only 2 of? johnny, after a moment "legs."

mrs brooks: "what is in your pants that you have but i do not have?"

johnny: "pockets."

mrs brooks: "what starts with c and ends with t, is hairy, oval and delicious and contains a whitish liquid?"

johnny: "coconut."

mrs brooks: "what goes in hard and pink and comes out soft and sticky?"

the principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer, johnny takes charge.....

johnny: "bubblegum."

mrs brooks: "what does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on 3 legs?"

the principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer.....

johnny: "shake hands."

mrs brooks: "now i will ask some 'who am i' questions, okay?"

mrs brooks: "you stick your poles inside me.you tie me down to get me up. i get wet before you do."

johnny: "tent."

mrs brooks: "a finger goes inside me. you fiddle with me when you're bored. the best man always has me first"

the principal was looking restless and a bit tense. johnny: "wedding ring."

mrs brooks: "i have a stiff shaft. my tip penetrates. i come with a quiver?"

johnny: "arrow."

mrs brooks: "what word starts with f and ends in k and means a lot of heat and excitement?"

johnny: "fire truck."

the principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to the teacher, "send johnny to university, i got the last ten questions wrong myself!"

Video:How To Get Good Grades

how to get good grades

must be fun to teach in high school.

Video:Assault During 8th Grade Basketball Game

assault during 8th grade basketball game

a basketball player is knocked to the ground and repeatedly punched in the face in an apparently unprovoked attack.

Video:Grade-A Beatdown

grade-a beatdown

a short clip of some guy getting completely owned. there's no way that kid is going outside within the next few weeks.

Video:Blonde in the Third Grade

blonde in the third grade

three third graders were walking down the street: a redhead, brunnette, and a blonde.

which one had the best figure?

the blonde - she was 18.

Video:Grades

grades

a high-school student came home one night rather depressed. "what's the matter, son?" asked his mother. "aw, gee," said the boy, "it's my grades. they're all wet." "what do you mean 'all wet?'" "you know," he replied, "...below c-level."

Video:Teen Threatens to Rape, Kill Teacher Over Grade

teen threatens to rape, kill teacher over grade

paterson, n.j. — a new jersey teenager allegedly threatened to rape and kill his teacher if she did not give his entire class an "a++" for the last school year.

the 14-year-old boy, identified only as a student at the paterson charter school for science and technology, made the threats in an e-mail sent in may, authorities said.

he also allegedly threatened to rape the teacher's mother and sister if the grades were not changed within 48 hours.

the youth turned himself in to passaic county authorities on friday and was charged with making terroristic threats and criminal coercion. he was released to his parent's custody pending a hearing in family court.


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Video:Lil Wayne in 7th Grade

lil wayne in 7th grade

this is lil wayne in middle school performing wizard of oz.

Video:LSD Improves Grades

lsd improves grades

i'm pretty sure he's wrong.

Video:Porn In 5th Grade Music Class

porn in 5th grade music class

parents of some maryland elementary students were stunned to learn their children had accidentally been shown some brief images of porn in class.

Video:Falling Grade

falling grade

peter walked up to his teacher s desk, holding a report card with a big red f. "if i were you," said peter, "i would change this while you still can." "why is that?" asked the teacher. "because my daddy told me that if i brought home one more failing report card, someone was going to get a beating."

Video:Poor Grades = Dead Bird

poor grades = dead bird

a lesson learned the hard way.


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Entry Dates: 9/8/2007-9/14/2009

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