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as a new, young md doing his residency in ob i was quite embarrassed when performing female pelvic exams. to cover my embarrassment i had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly. the middle-aged lady upon whom i was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughing and further embarrassing me. i looked up from my work and sheepishly said 'i'm sorry. was i tickling you?' she replied with tears running down her cheeks from laughing so hard. 'no doctor but the song you were whistling was 'i wish i was an oscar meyer wiener.’'
a man comes into the er and yells 'my wife's going to have her baby in the cab.' i grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress and began to take off her underwear. suddenly i noticed that there were several cabs - - - and i was in the wrong one.
at the beginning of my shift, i placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient's anterior chest wall. 'big breaths,' i instructed. 'yes, they used to be,' replied the patient.
one day, i had to be the bearer of bad news when i told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. not more than five minutes later, i heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he had died of a 'massive internal fart.'
during a patient's two-week follow-up appointment with his cardiologist, he informed me, his doctor, that he was having trouble with one of his medications. ‘which one?'.i asked. 'the patch. the nurse told me to put on a new one every six hours and now i'm running out of places to put it!' i had him quickly undress and discovered what i hoped i wouldn't see. yes, the man had over fifty patches on his body! now the instructions include removal of the old patch before applying a new one.
while acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, i asked, 'how long have you been bedridden?' after a look of complete confusion she answered 'why, not for about twenty years - when my husband was alive.'
a nurse was on duty in the emergency room when a young woman with purple hair styled into a punk rocker mohawk, sporting a variety of tattoos, and wearing strange clothing, entered. it was quickly determined that the patient had acute appendicitis, so she was scheduled for immediate surgery. when she was completely disrobed on the operating table, the staff noticed that her pubic hair had been dyed green and above it there was a tattoo that read 'keep off the grass.' once the surgery was completed, the surgeon wrote a short note on the patient's dressing which said 'sorry, had to mow the lawn.'
i was performing rounds at the hospital one morning and while checking up on a man i asked ' so how's your breakfast this morning?' 'it's very good except for the kentucky jelly. i can't seem to get used to the taste.’ bill replied. i then asked to see the jelly and bill produced a foil packet labeled 'ky jelly'
nothing like getting arrested while wearing womens clothes in public.
this is really strange and really weirdl. these are some painful sounding screw-ups.
a couple of funny segments. accidents 13,14,15.
oh, you wanted a urine sample.
bet he felt a right idiot.
this has to be the worst moment of this lady singers life.
one of the most disgusting incidents in the history of cricket.
article submitted by master911. red-faced officials at the office of government commerce are trying to explain the thinking behind their new logo. it cost £14,000 to create, but unfortunately nobody thought about what it would like when turned on its side. the logo was intended to signify a commitment to the body’s aim of “improving value for money by driving up standards and capability in procurement”. instead, it may turn the organization into a laughing stock. insiders say the logo was already emblazoned on to mousepads and pens before it was unveiled for employees, who spotted an 'alternative interpretation' of the logo within seconds. a spokesman for ogc said: “it is true that it caused a few titters among some staff when viewed on its side, but on consideration we concluded that the effect was generic to the particular combination of the letters ogc - and it is not inappropriate to an organization that’s looking to have a firm grip on government spend. source
even though the disappearance of molly bish is a serious thing, this clip is pretty hilarious. the suspect should be considered armed and very adorable.
poor guy gets his mom interrupting his sex life.
thiese moms need to get a life and stop trying to hold a playa down =(
a man 'accidentally' gets his schlong stuck in a swimming pool pump.
this baby's father realised too late how his new son's name sounded when said out loud. taken from the sun newspaper in england.
