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a regular at a local pub stopped in one evening. to his surprise and delight, the old haggardly man that had bartended there for the past 5 years had been replaced by a tall, buxom blonde. he decided to test her.
"hey, miss! yes, bartender!" at this, she shimmied over to him.
"yes, sir? what can i get you?"
"nothing, just yet... but i'd like to make a bet with you."
a bit amused she asked, "okay, let's hear it."
he smirked as he slapped a $10 bill on the bar and said, "i'll bet you 10 dollars that i can bite my own ear."
"you're on!" she said, pulling a ten out of her tip pouch and placing it on top of his.
at this, the man pulled out his false teeth and nipped his left ear with them before swiping the money off the bar.
the blonde chuckled, "okay, you got me."
the man wasn't done. placing a ten on the bar yet again, he posed, "i also bet you 10 dollars that i can go use your bathroom and never take my eye off my beer!"
"now that's impossible," she said. "our bathroom is around the corner and at the end of that hall! i accept!" and she pounded another ten on the bar.
so the man removed his glass eye, set it down to watch his beer, went to use the bar restroom, and returned with a laugh, taking the money from the bar.
"damn you, you're good," she admitted. "but you can't fool me anymore!"
"one more, and i'm done," the man declared. "double or nothing - i'll bet you i can make love to you so gently that you'll never even feel it."
"oh, i think i know a thing or two about that!" she said, confident. she led the man into the back room and he began fucking her twelve ways from tuesday! the blonde began giggling, "hee hee - i can feel you!"
"oh well," the man said. "you can't win 'em all!"
