Search Results for “51”
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Video:
a bartender is sitting behind the bar on a typical day, when the door bursts open and in come four exuberant blondes. they come up to the bar, order five bottles of champagne and ten glasses, take their order over and sit down at a large table.
the corks are popped, the glasses are filled and they begin toasting and chanting, "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"
soon, three more blondes arrive, take up their drinks and the chanting grows. "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"
two more blondes show up and soon their voices are joined in raising the roof. "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"
finally, the tenth blonde comes in with a picture under her arm. she walks over to the table, sets the picture in the middle and the table erupts. up jumps the others, they begin dancing around the table, exchanging high-fives, all the while chanting "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"
the bartender can't contain his curiosity any longer, so he walks over to the table. there in the center is a beautifully framed children's jigsaw puzzle. when the frenzy dies down a little bit, the bartender asks one of the blondes, "what's all the chanting and celebration about?"
the blonde who brought in the picture explains, "everyone thinks that blondes are dumb and they make fun of us. so, we decided to set the record straight. ten of us got together, bought that puzzle and put it together.
"the side of the box said 2 to 4 years, but we put it together in 51 days!"
Video:
1. your name must be daisy, because i have the incredible urge to plant you right here!
2. roses are red, violets are blue, i like spaghetti, let's go screw.
3. just call me milk, i'll do your body good.
4. your body's name must be visa, because it's everywhere i want to be.
5. can i buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?
6. i may not be fred flintstone, but i bet i can make your bed rock.
7. i may not be the best looking guy here, but i'm the only one talking to you.
8. my love for you is like the energizer bunny, it keeps going and going .
9. that shirt looks very becoming on you, but if i were on you, i'd be coming too.
10. yo baby, you be my dairy queen, i'll be your burger king, you treat me right, and i'll do it your way right away.
11. i'd like to screw your brains out, but it appears that someone beat me to it.
12. i enjoy doing maintenance, you look like someone i would like to "tinker" around with.
13. you must be from pearl harbor, cause baby you're the bomb.
14. if you were a new hamburger at mcdonald's, you would be mcgorgeous.
15. is that windex? because i can see myself in your pants.
16. i'm a bird watcher and i'm looking for a big breasted bed thrasher, have you seen one?
17. i wish you were a pony carousel outside walmart, so i could ride you all day long for a quarter.
18. wanna play house? you be the screen door and i'll slam you all night long.
19. if you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon.
20. oh, i'm sorry, i thought that was a braille name tag.
21. if you were a car, i wax you and ride you all over town.
22. guy: "would you like to dance?" girl: "i don't care for this song and surely wouldn't dance with you" guy: "i'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me, i said you look fat in those pants"
23. excuse me, do you have your phone number, i've seem to have lost mine.
24. i look good on you.
25. i'm new in town, could i have directions to your house.
26. if your left leg was thanksgiving and your right leg christmas, can i visit you between the holidays?
27. you look like a girl that has heard every line in the book, so what's one more going to hurt?
28. fuck me if i'm wrong, but is your name yolanda?
29. i love every bone in your body - especially mine.
30. excuse me, do you wanna fuck, or should i apologize?
31. you might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
32. do you want to dance? no? well i guess a fuck is out of the question.
33. hi, i'm a necrophiliac, how good are you at playing dead?
34. i lost my bed, can i borrow yours?
35. you must be jamaican, because jamaican me crazy.
36. my recipe for love is one cup of you, one cup of me, knead till hard, and serve hot.
37. are your legs tired, because you've been running through my mind all day long.
38. you be the tree, and i'll wrap you like a koala.
39. hey baby, i'm like american express, you don't want to leave home without me.
40. do you have a quarter? my mother told me to call home when i met the girl of my dreams.
41. the word for the night is legs, let's go back to my room and spread the word.
42. hey baby, what's your sign? caution, slippery when wet, dangerous curves ahead, yield?
43. hi my name is _______, remember it, cause you'll be screaming it all night long.
44. i can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? i think he went into this cheap motel room.
45. was your dad a farmer? cause you sure have great melons.
46. want to play conductor? you be the engineer and i'll go choo choo.
47. you must be jelly, cause jam don't shake like that.
48. the fact that i'm missing my teeth just means that there's more room for your tongue.
49. guy: "haven't i seen you someplace before?" girl: "yes, that's why i don't go there anymore"
50. hi, my name is skippy, like the peanut butter i stick to the roof of your mouth.
51. hi, my name is pogo, want to jump on my stick?
